(Source: jezie-of-stars)
Tracks
When someone asked me if I like my residents
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY DIFFERENT KINDS OF PASTA
if i had a penne for every time i’ve asked myself that same question
you didnt just do that
That’s essentially how I feel every time I decide to leave the house
cause i may be bad but i’m perfectly good at it
Grass in the air, I don’t care, I like the smell of it
(Source: getoutoftherecat)
I’ve been craving french fries and ice cream for the past week
Well all I crave is sugar so that’s pretty spot-on!
“Bulky, filling foods” …so much innuendo.
(Source: petitia)
My picks from #safetytipsforladies on Twitter.
brilliant
ALWAYS REBLOG.
actually sitting here crying with laughter
SEXUAL CONSENT VOLTRON
‘if a man is not a legitimate rapist his body will find a way to shut the gunshot wounds down’
“Stay in the womb. It’s the last time you’ll have full personhood anyway.” IT’S SO TRUE IT HURTS.
Whoever said RA’s get higher grades…
CLEARLY never had a semester like I did. I mean…I got B’s in all of my classes, so it literally did nothing to my overall GPA, but still. I’m just annoyed. And glad the semester and the job is over.
Should’ve stuck to the status quo
Angers the pope.
(Source: racismschool)
Tumblr, I’d like to introduce: Stumphrey
He’ll be coming home with us on May 25th. He and Corgnelius will be brothers. And when i say brothers, i mean literally brothers- they came from the same corgi mom and dad :) Pretty soon, it will be double the cuteness and corgi madness. Can’t wait.
STUMPHREY!
I’VE GOT A JOB!!!
The YMCA hired me! I am now an assistant preschool teacher! (not quite as cool as a playologist, Wandleez, but it’s up there!)
Apparently they wanted to hire me right away, but they were waiting to get ahold of one of my references. It somehow slipped my mind that my boss, who was one of my references, was moving to Minneapolis, so the office number they were trying to reach her at wasn’t hers anymore.
But guys. I’ve got a job. An ACTUAL job. A job IN MY MAJOR. What?!
partybarackisinthehousetonight:
my life changed forever when i found out the word “slang” was actually slang for “shortened language”
Clearly she wears those short skirts and skimpy tank tops because she wants the d. and by d I mean vitamin d. she wants to soak up as much sun as she can. because revealing clothes are not an invitation for sex u prick
I just cried. I legit just read this and broke down and cried.
Am I that lost?
